Ash Wednesday is the start of the Christian tradition of Lent, which lasts for forty days, ending on Easter Sunday (this year, April 9).
Lent is for hunting demons. Yours.
Every faith tradition has something like Lent. And each of them are similar in what they offer to humans. I mean these traditions are not meant to wholly and exclusively focus on one’s sins (read: moral failures, errors the result of which cause harm). I mean such traditions are meant to help a human being, not to bemoan their sins or wear hair shirts, but learn about their humanity, and improve.
They encourage us during the 40 days to ask ourselves questions: 1) Paul Gauguin: “Where do we come from? What are we? Where are we going?” These questions one can ask when thinking about humanity (and G_d knows of late we need to be asking them). But for lent it is appropriate to ask them of ourselves. 2) Hillel the Elder: “If I am not for myself, who will be for me? If I am not for others, what am I? And if not now, when?” Other questions might be similar but more personal: Who am I? What makes me happy? How do I maintain a moral stance in a world where the line and the balance between what is good and humane versus what is not? Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labour on what does not satisfy? (Isaiah 55:1).
We also ask questions of G_d. Does G_d exist? How can I know for sure? How can a good G_d exist with so much harm happening in the world? If I were to commit myself in trust (not ‘faith’ as in credenda) to G_d, how do I do that? If I do that, how will it help me answer all these other questions? Regarding Christianity, on what basis would I trust myself to God in any of the institutions known as churches at this point in history?
Participation in Lent is a starting point, to add to or development a practice that can help us address (or scream at, or think about, or share about) some of those questions above. Or perhaps just one, whatever one thinks is the most important. One adds or subtracts activities during those 40 days. Add or subtract food or drink, read a book or two or more that challenges our perception of ourselves and the world, gather for sacred meals with others who are of a similar disposition.
One thing I have learned in walking this road of 40 miles (days) is that i have to work at being committed to whatever I feel I need to do, but also have compassion for myself when I fall down (as long as it does not turn into narcissism) . The second most important thing I have learned is that I have to learn to have compassion for others at the same time. I imagine the journey to be walking the El Camino. One is alone walking the dusty road, heavy loads on the back and in thee ind or heart, imminent sore parts of the body, the weight of a conscience perhaps and then sometimes we walk with others for a time, share a meal, learn kindness and generosity but still trust that this walk is not only worth it, but necessary.
But one has to know that this journey, travelled with integrity, commitment and a trust in the spiritual nature of the work, one never knows what will come up or out of our minds or memories. After all these years, it may be ancient feelings of hurt or shame. Guilt over something we didn’t feel guilty about before, but now that we have grown a little, we have become conscious of it is another feeling. We may find there is a good deal more work for us to do, beyond this year’s lent. Whatever we might call these things that arise, I call them demons. I believe and have complete faith that demons exist. They are not the ones you are thinking of; it is not a personal devil or demon or a dude named ‘satan’, but they are real. And they are ours, and ours alone; it is they that claw their way into our soul and hearts and minds, invited in by ourselves or let in by others.
This is the genuine work of Lent: to hunt our demons, root them out and find a place to put them so we know where they are. And never forget. The threat is that we start out well but then get nervous or afraid or angry and we take a byway off the road, throw our burdened backpack into a closet and lock it all away again, this time forever. Be warned: this journey, this work, is serious stuff. It is hard work. If one continues to the end, they can be healthier, saner, less anxious. Not perfect or ‘done’, but more human and more humane to others.
Over the course of the next 40 days I will add a piece each week to this blog. I am doing this because i need to be reminded again about what I am doing, about my struggle with trust, about this journey and answering questions. These submissions will be based upon a text from the Abramic Codicil (the scriptures of the Christians) that is read on the first Sunday of Lent (Matthew 4:1-11 and Luke 4:1-12-Mark has a much shorter version).
These texts are about Jesus, as a human being. He faced the same demons and temptations as do we. through this story over the next few weeks, we will explore our psychic, spiritual and mental realities of our humanity, not about Jesus as divine or his story. This story is about the human beings who read and ponder these texts. They can be a guide and a help.
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Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the tempter** He fasted forty days and forty nights, and afterward he was hungry. The tempter came and said, “If you are the Son of God, command these stones to become loaves of bread.” But Jesus answered, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.’”
Then the tempter took him to the holy city, and set him on the pinnacle of the temple, and said, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down; for it is written, ‘He will give his angels charge of you,’ and. ‘On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.’”
Jesus said to him, “Again it is written, ‘You shall not tempt the Lord your God.’” The tempter took him to a very high mountain, and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their glory; and the tempter said, “All these I will give you, if you will fall down and worship me.” Jesus said to him, “Begone, tempter! for it is written, ‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve.’”
The tempter left him, and behold, angels came and ministered to him.
**The author of Matt’s Gospel uses two terms in greek for the being (five times) that meets Jesus in the desert: ‘satan’ and ‘diabolos’ Translators have used ‘devil’ or tempter for the latter. ‘Satan’ was a specific but quite obscure figure with the same kind of role. Four of the times written were diabolos. Why the writer chose to use ‘satan’ for the last is odd because both words have to do with literally someone who, “casts through,” i.e. making charges that bring down,” (destroy), to slander, accuse with a vengeance. Diabolos was turned into ‘devil’ centuries later. Think of an unscrupulous or nasty lawyer in a courtroom who has been paid off to get a conviction when you see the word ‘devil’ (diabolos). Jesus is being tempted, not threatened with fire and damnation.
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